Balancing Act

It's fascinating how sometimes a theme seems to emerge between random things that cross your path.

This past week seems to be a lot about balance....

Suppose with the start of a new year there's a lot of people thinking about how to improve, how to get more balance: my twitter feed seems to be dominated by people seeking balance or "helpful" articles on how to get organised, stress less, drink less, eat less.

Then last week up popped the storm surrounding the disparity between the pay of male and female graduates - my legal industry being amongst the culprits.  That seems to be a lot about balance as well, a different type of balance.

Many jumped straight on the bandwagon of presuming it meant that a firm taking on male and female graduates were paying lining the two of them up and employing the male for more.  However, the study, which does have some questions around it, was looking at the median gap.  Now Pete will be horrified at the thought that I am analysing something so mathematical, but to me a difference in the median is demonstrating more that women are being employed in the lower paying graduate positions.  Now being someone who obtained my graduate position in the country (and was employed at the then award rate of $12,500) I can see how that might be happening.  I also know that there graduate wages in the law are now paid more realistically and that there is less of a gap between city and country on graduate wages but I suspect seeing less women in the higher paid areas might still be happening.

If my theory is even partly correct, why are women graduates pushed to that end?  Commentators were suggesting it has nothing to do with family issues as graduates are only 25.  Is it though that employers are cherry picking against those likely to be balancing family demands in the future?  For lawyers, is it because there are many mature-aged female graduates who have other demands competing with what jobs they can accept?

If that wasn't enough to make me feel a little unbalanced, I then got to an item on my to-do-list at work which put me right into the balance zone - been meaning to do it for a while but actually got around to having a go at drafting some family-friendly flexible work guidelines and practices for my own firm (yeah, shoe makers children not shod).  We have a number of support staff working a variety of arrangements and have that area done well.  But for our lawyers?  In drafting (ironcially occurying while Pete took the boys to the pool) I could draw on many, many experiences I have had over the last 7 and a bit years of combining full time work and being a mother to some very little people (including one very sick little girl).  But what is balance?  How do you help someone in that position? Isn't there a lot more we can do?

Load on top of that then the balance of the school holidays.  Having had 6 weeks away from the office this year at RCH (note I said away from the office, wasn't all not working) and so on I ditched my earlier idea of being able to take all of January off and came up with this complicated spreadsheet of sharing the holiday load.  It includes a week of me and Pete working what could only be described as one doing the early shift, one doing the late shift.  Then there was the working from home morning where I discovered our servers remote connection had shut off during Christmas - and it is not back yet!  

Balance, it was getting there.

Despite those hitches I thought we might be right, I even had a chart of all our dinners for January organised, including nominating nights for new recipes.  However this grand plan was depedent upon Raff having some creche time and Remus having some office time .......then the balance was upended by a dose of the chicken pox.

Mentioning this to others, seems there's lots of parents out there doing the holiday shuffle.  I was amazed the other night to hear a talkback radio topic was how are you managing if you are a holiday bachelor/bachelorette - in the city home alone having left the rest of the family down the coast.  Does that actually happen these days?  That seems a world away from most experiences I know

So balance, it is popping up everywhere but I haven't seen too many solutions.  Sometimes I feel like there are a lot of hungry hippos around............. (and I must clean the top of that game, look how smudgy it is)

New Year Resolutions

Only one of these a day (the latte, not the random motorbike)

I love New Years Resolutions.....love the idea of a fresh start, a new chance, the daydreams of what life will be like with all the goals achieved.

Many a Christmas break has been spent lounging around with friends finishing the last of the Christmas bubbles and chocolates as we plan what our resolutions will be, sometimes focussing more on setting the rewards than the goals.  For a few years a group of us maintained a regime involving monthly spreadsheets where we reported on progress against resolutions.....there's probably an app for that now.

While many of the resolutions pop up year after year there have been some spectacular successes.  I think my best success was the year one resolution was to not buy bottled water, succeeded on not only doing that but sticking with it since then.  On the other hand there would be more resolutions thought that repeat from year to year.

So this year:

1. Lose 20 kilos

Yeah, a constant on the list! and I could aim for even more than 20kg but let's say 20 at this stage.  It's like hitting play on the recorder: record everything I eat and drink, drink more water, smaller serving sizes etc etc.  Really, the last 18 months has been a write off for focussing on such things, so here goes

2. Exercise 30 minutes every day

Yes, it is really part of resolution 1.  Yes it can be averaged out with the next day if you miss a day.  it's just about moving more

3. run a 5km fun run

So, resolution 2 if done well becomes resolution 3.  A big one.   Seems like the pavements are pounding at the moment with everyone doing couch to 5k, count me in.  Aiming to do this by August.

4. No more than 2 lattes per day

I can drink litres of milk a day on lattes, must stop doing that.  I can do it, just need to re-set.

5. Only buy lunch once per week

Yep, I'm signing up to one of the most popular New Years resolutions

6. Read at least 26 books in 2013

Read 18 last year according to Goodreads

7. No i-product use between getting home and 9pm mon to fri and before 5 of a weekend.

Starting when go back to work next week, obviously!  Must convince myself that as I no longer have the excuse of hours on the couch breastfeeding, that means I can't spend hours on the couch on the iPad.  Who knows, it might even motivate me to explore that new-fangled web-enabled treadmill at gym for pinning and tweeting.

8. Cake only once a month

In Melbourne for the day, I'm not here often (ha), must treat myself to something at Brunetti's.

It's been a tough morning, need to have a cake with that coffee at morning tea.

It's someone's birthday, yes I'll have that jelly slice.

Walking past Gillies (which is no longer called Gillies) may as well have an apple cake.

My ability to justify cake sees no bounds.  For most of last year such treats were about daily.  It has to stop.  And if it doesn't I'll even have to 'fess up to this little addiction -

9. Cheese only once a month

My cheese addiction is bad, nowhere near as bad as cake but more a "once it is in the house I have to demolish it and usually with a slab of quince paste as well".  Less frequently, but always high quality from here I say.

10. No Saturday night platters

The last 18 months has seen a lot of Saturday nights at home.  I initially blame Before the Game - established a little tradition of putting together a few nibbles (cheese, dips, olives, you get the drift) to have with a few drinks as Before the Game marked Saturday turning into Saturday evening.  The platters got bigger, there got to be more drinks and then I'd still polish off the dinner of the night - even after Before the Game left Saturday night.

11 Purchase no new clothes for me before St Patrick's Day

I actually achieved this resolution last year and will give it another whirl.

Some may think it was a bit too easy for last year - I did spend the time from New Year until 9 days before St Patrick's Day in the last trimester of pregnancy but anyone who has been there knows that is, contrary to rational thought, a time you want new clothes.  Probably saved me from a few irrational purchases.

It did set me up for a year of reduced purchasing.  In 2012 I purchased only 12 new items of clothing.  I would usually buy 12 items in one visit to one store.

In some ways, the year that was last year was probably not the best time to not indulge in my favourite hobby (shopping) and best stress relief (spending money), but it did open some new horizons.  I shopped my wardrobe - finding things that I had forgotten I ever purchased, finding new combinations of what to wear with what.

Of course last year it was replaced with shopping for baby girl outfits, shall be interesting to see if I can last as long when I have nothing exciting to shop for (sorry boys, it's not the same).

Why St Patrick's Day - it gives 2 and a half months of no purchasing to break the habit ( a habit which really hasn't been indulged since mid-October in any event)  but gives in to my worry of what would happen if there was something I really had to have for winter and it was sold out by Easter?

And if I stick with resolutions 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 8, 9 and 10 I will be 3 dress sizes down by St Patrick's Day (in which case I have 4 unworn black dresses in my wardrobe that would get me through winter.....)

12 Finish renovations

It is now 2 years at least since our renovation plans started in earnest: time they got some focus

13. Travel overseas

Mmmmm...

Some would say 13 resolutions is far too many - but really 8 of them are all part of the first resolution, quite focussed really

They are terribly self centered resolutions: none benefiting the wider community, people in need, no career or professional goals (though I admit they are a separate list).  I think it is time to focus on me for a little while.....

Think I might check in here monthly to advise of progress - and hopefully cross most of them off in 6 months time!